Last week was my father's birthday. He passed away about 3 1/2 years ago. My daughter was three and I was pregnant with my son. He and my daughter were very close (as he and I were also). They had such fun together and he loved her so much. She loved him too and still talks about things he used to. They had a special relationship and I am so thankful for the years she had with him, however, I can't help but think of what fun he would have had with my son. They are so much alike. I know my father would have had a ball with him too. I find myself thinking when my son does something cute or throws the ball really well that my dad would have found so much joy in those times. I also think about the trips he would have loved to have taken with my children.
I have many photos and videos of my father that I show my son and will say "that is Papaw." He knows his face, but he will never know the man. I get emotional writing those words. God always has a plan and I know in my heart that my son came into the world as my father was leaving to help ease the pain of losing him and to see him again in my son.
Not only did it help ease my pain, but it helped my mother and my daughter as well. My daughter had a lot of questions that were sometimes hard for me to answer-or at least on her level. She wanted to know where he was. I told her he was in Heaven and she could look to the sky to talk to him and he could hear her. She wanted to know why she couldn't hear him talk back to her, how he got up there and when he was coming back home. I tried to answer as simply as I could, but be honest at the same time. It made her feel at ease knowing she would one day see him again and that he could hear her talking to him. Even to this day I sometimes hear her talking to him while looking up out of the window.
Have you experienced the death of a parent before the birth of your child or have your children had to experience the death of one of their grandparents? If so, what are some of the ways you have helped your child or children know the grandparent they will never know or helped them deal with the death of a grandparent?
